posted by ![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
devohoneybee at 06:38am on 11/03/2011
devohoneybee at 06:38am on 11/03/2011I was at a little gathering from work last night -- 8 of us got together for a little drinks and appetizers bash at a local restaurant to celebrate doing well at an external review we'd been preparing for for MONTHS. One of the people present started speaking about her Mormon ancestry, how she had moved away from it for parts of her life, but was now gathered back into the fold, so to speak. She gave as part of the reason for her return the feeling of "owing" it to her ancestors for all they went through and suffered for their faith, like, not wanting to let them down. Then she turned to me and said, (implying, as a Jewish person), "you can relate to that, right, from your tradition?"
I had to really stop and think. Do I feel an obligation, of any kind. to a certain relationship to religion or religiosity, because of my ancestors?
And the answer, which didn't come clear until this morning, is, "No." I respect them, I wish I had known them (the men and women who would have been grandparents, uncles, aunts were murdered by Nazis before I was born). I don't feel as if either their lives nor their deaths or suffering obligate me to any particular kind of life, except possibly a life of meaning. Possibly. Being alive, really alive, may be my best offering.
I keep kosher, to the extent that I do it, not to please my ancestors, or even God (frankly I just don't believe any God worthy of worship would care what kind of meat I eat - honestly, there are more important things to think about). I do it because I have found meaning in it -- the way the restrictions of kashrut temper the instinctual act of eating with consciousness, the respect that eating is an act of consuming another being, whether an animal or plant, and that as humans, we have the opportunity to engage in more than an animal nature about this. Kashrut, like any such practice, as an act of intentional awakening.
I feel driven to strive to be good (at the same time I endorse Mary Oliver's poem, with the lines, "you do not have to be good..... you only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves"). So what is "good"? Hard to define in specifics, but inclusive of things like honor, respect, compassion -- bringing Light and kindness wherever I can. Honoring gifts -- mine and others, and nurturing them. Trying to help when I can. Bringing intelligence, critical awareness, even the knife of mockery and laughter, when that serves the Light. WAKING UP, myself and others, mostly myself, as a way to invite those around me, to find the light and goodness and kindness within themselves.
This talk descends to rambling and imprecision. At best, the finger pointing at the moon, not the moon itself. But yeah, striving for all that, and more I can't name just yet, for a better understanding, and for learning to get better at rolling, when I fall down.
This is my religion.
What's yours?
I had to really stop and think. Do I feel an obligation, of any kind. to a certain relationship to religion or religiosity, because of my ancestors?
And the answer, which didn't come clear until this morning, is, "No." I respect them, I wish I had known them (the men and women who would have been grandparents, uncles, aunts were murdered by Nazis before I was born). I don't feel as if either their lives nor their deaths or suffering obligate me to any particular kind of life, except possibly a life of meaning. Possibly. Being alive, really alive, may be my best offering.
I keep kosher, to the extent that I do it, not to please my ancestors, or even God (frankly I just don't believe any God worthy of worship would care what kind of meat I eat - honestly, there are more important things to think about). I do it because I have found meaning in it -- the way the restrictions of kashrut temper the instinctual act of eating with consciousness, the respect that eating is an act of consuming another being, whether an animal or plant, and that as humans, we have the opportunity to engage in more than an animal nature about this. Kashrut, like any such practice, as an act of intentional awakening.
I feel driven to strive to be good (at the same time I endorse Mary Oliver's poem, with the lines, "you do not have to be good..... you only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves"). So what is "good"? Hard to define in specifics, but inclusive of things like honor, respect, compassion -- bringing Light and kindness wherever I can. Honoring gifts -- mine and others, and nurturing them. Trying to help when I can. Bringing intelligence, critical awareness, even the knife of mockery and laughter, when that serves the Light. WAKING UP, myself and others, mostly myself, as a way to invite those around me, to find the light and goodness and kindness within themselves.
This talk descends to rambling and imprecision. At best, the finger pointing at the moon, not the moon itself. But yeah, striving for all that, and more I can't name just yet, for a better understanding, and for learning to get better at rolling, when I fall down.
This is my religion.
What's yours?